I Guess I'm Young, But I Feel So Weary.

The other night while laying here thinking of 1001 ways to not be a fatty mcfatterson anymore (aka get healthy and lose 10 pounds) my mind started wandering. It tiptoed past the life lessons I've learned in my years. Some good. Some bad. Some pathetic. And I decided it would be fun to share them with the universe (and by universe I mean the three or four friends who read my blog, but that is neither here nor there). So here just celebrating my birthday I shall share with you 32 things I am oh so wise about. And I look forward to learning #33...

1. Carbs make you fat. Well, maybe not you, but definitely me. A big FU to refined, delicious, and heavenly carbs for making me gain weight. It may be possibly because I refuse to stop eating them with wild abandon, but they still definitely are contributors to the problem.Yes, Frito Lay, I am talking to YOU! One day I will wise up and stick to those healthier ones known as fruits, veggies, whole grains. At least I hope that I wise up. Oh gosh, somebody please oh please make me wise the hell up.

2. You don't have to complete your degree to get a really great job. I am very proud that I have been able to work my way into a fantastic career that I love. I know that I am super lucky to even make notably more in salary than many of my friends who pursued higher education to it's finish. However, this does not mean I discourage a college education. In fact it's quite the opposite. I think it is a great opportunity for anyone who can make it happen. I fully intended to stay on that path; life just lead me along a different road that worked with my young mom lifestyle. Bottom line, stay in school dudes... however it is possible to work around the road blocks and be a success without it. It's just not all peaches and cream every day, but is life really ever?

3. Boys that karaoke 'Wonderwall' to you probably don't have the best intentions. Now, I've been working in this life to avoid stereotyping or judging books by their covers. I'm just saying if you have a questionable fella in your life, and his choice of song to sing when you're out for karaoke is 'Wonderwall' or 'Champagne Supernova', you better watch your back! Cute (insane) boys + Oasis songs = Life Ruiners

4. Friends will come and they will go. Even the closest of friends grow apart sometimes. Things happen in this topsy turvy ass life of ours and we slip away. Most times it's not really intentional. Some of them change when they get into relationships, marriages, jobs, have kids, blah to the blah blah. Sometimes it really sucks and you miss them really bad. Sometimes they come back! And sometimes they don't. Either way life goes on and the friends who are current in your world are more than willing to fill the void and then some if you let them. So let them!

5. Animals can make you really happy. I know it's cliche'-y, but man's best friend and all that crap...TRUTH! I love my dog (as I did his predecessor) with all my weirdo little heart x1000. If you ever find your life full of suckage consider getting a pet yo. If you ever need any proof of this just ask to see my phone and the gallery of Rocco pictures I have for your viewing pleasure.

6. It is possible to "conjure" people. If you ever find your mind a'wanderin off about someone or something that is no longer in your life for a reason there's a very good chance that they'll show up at the store or your work or friend ya on the internets the very same day you type their name into google and find unsavory things. So think before you think so to speak.

7. Be the thing you envy. Jealousy sucks, bad. And if you spend your life being envious of everyone else you miss out on the parts of your life that are YOU. Even though other people's lives seem cooler, more fun, they are able to take naps and eat their food without being interrupted 8000996656456454546544677777889 times, this doesn't mean that at the end of the day they are any happier than you are. Who knows? Maybe they think that their life sucks big time. If your pal (or chick on a blog with cute clothes, a cute nice looking [not as in good looking, but as in not mean looking] helpful husband, her own business, and endless money) seems to have it all take a moment to find out what pieces you admire. If someone is chasing their dream, find time to look into yours, even if just a little. Learn something new. Take a trip. Do that thing that looks so damn cool to you. If all else fails at least you were too busy to be jealous.

8. Don't think that writing a list of things you have learned that coordinates with the years in your life is a good idea. If you are, oh god, over 30 ( I swear I never thought I'd live to be this old. Not with the way I drive.) well that's just too much shit to write up. No one is gonna care that much. Know when enough is enough and call it a night. Make that story a series. Yeah, something to look forward to. Oh that's good.

So please enjoy the first, very strategic, installment of the things I have learned in this uber fabulous life of mine. Somewhere along the line I will start up again with number 9. Any cool/funny/interesting life lessons you've learned that you wanna share?